The Wildwood Presence

Bellies full after a long day on the road, the companions finally settled down for the evening. It was a clear night and they had decided almost unanimously to sleep in the open instead of taking the time to put together their tents. Alaster, of course, detested the idea of sleeping outside of the relative safety of a tent and had made a point of making certain the rest of the companions knew it. When Blue cleverly suggested he put together his own damn tent or shut the hell up so the rest of them could sleep, he very smartly went from a full rant to one merely muttered under his breath. It was the best they were going to get.

Staring up at the stars, the friends lay in amicable silence, listening to the symphony of the night and the crackling of the campfire. A coyote howled in the distance, and Kael sat up perking an ear to listen. This was more than Alaster could take. “We are bloody well going to get eaten out here in this accursed Gods forsaken ruddy forest,” he moaned, not caring that some of his fellows might be already asleep.

“Shhhhh,” warned Artemis, rolling onto her side to peer at the faerie, the image of the campfire burning in her eyes. “The wildwood will not appreciate your insults. I have witnessed the the wild drag a man to his death over less.” There was an audible gulp from the faerie, and Artemis flashed him a wicked grin.

“That couldn't be true,” snapped Alaster,  voice cracking just a tad. “The stupid forest and trees are inanimate. It couldn't bloody well drag a man to his death.”

“You are wrong,” came Kniles’ sober voice from the other side of the campfire. “The wildwoods have a presence you would be wise to respect.”

“Every tree that populates this forest has the ability to turn on travelers,” agreed Artemis, somewhat gleefully. She watched with joy as the color drained from Alaster’s face.

“You had better apologize,” Shadow’s voice added softly.  Beside her, a menacing growl reverberated in the throat of Kael, her hackles raising.

Apparently this was enough to give Alaster a start, because he called into the forest. “I apologize! I meant nothing by my comments. You are a very beautiful forest and I did not mean to insult you!” At this, Blue snorted and the rest of the party dissolved into laughter. Alaster scowled. “Oh, ha ha,” he began, voice dripping in sarcasm. “Very clever. I suppose you all were in on it. You even trained the bloody dog to growl.” They laughed harder, even Kael let her tongue roll out in a wolfish grin. “Ignoramuses all of you,” Alaster snapped, quite put out by the lot of them. “I bet you all feel quite accomplished.”

“You’ve got that right,” agreed Kniles. “I could barely keep a straight face.” Further giggles and murmurs of agreement followed.

“It’s an old trick hunters pull on children,” explained Artemis, unable to hide the amusement in her tone. “I didn’t expect a grown man to be susceptible to such an outlandish tale.”

Fae couldn’t suppress a laugh from her bedroll. “My own sister,” complained an indignant Alaster, rounding on the wingless fairy. “Were you in on this as well, Alexandriana?”

“Of course not,” assured Fae in a pacifying tone, though her eyes still twinkled with undisguised mirth, “but I can enjoy the humor.”

“I need a ruddy drink,” muttered Alaster to yet another round of glee from his companions before he rose and headed towards their supplies and his store of spirits. Uncorking the bottle, he took a healthy swig before a twig snapping nearby brought him pause. “Very funny, nitwits, but you can't fool me twice,” he shouted towards the sound.

“What are you on about?” called Blue from her place beside the fire. “We’re still too busy laughing at your gullibility.” This was followed by another chorus of snorts and giggles.

Alaster’s eyes widened as he turned toward the forest. Was that… whispering? He gripped the bottle like a weapon and took a timid step forward, then gradually another until the whispers were forming coherent speech. Alaster turned his ear to get a better listen.

“It's so wonderful to make your acquaintance. Would you know, I have been traveling in the woods for weeks now and you are the first tree to whom I thought to introduce myself.” What in the hell? “I really do feel quite silly. But, better late than never!”

“Zi!” came a harsh voice, making Alaster startle, “for the love of all that is holy, stop this nonsense at once and go to bed.”

“But Yuna,” whispered the voice, in an exaggerated whine,  “I don't want to be rude to my new friend.” Alaster exhaled a sigh of relief. It was that idiot elf up to something stupid again. She must have slipped away unnoticed when the other fools were ribbing him. This was of no matter.

“You don't have a new friend,” snapped Yuna. “Now go to bed.”

“Okay,” came the dejected idiot-elf’s response which then brightened considerably as she directed her attention to what Alaster could only assume was one of the trees. “Goodnight, dear tree. I'm sure you are tired too. I will call on you in the morning. Do you like oatmeal? I would be delighted to split my breakfast with a new friend.”

Alaster smirked to himself over this comment. No doubt he would find half a bowl of the breakfast piled neatly underneath this tree in the morning. He also expected the nitwits to have a time convincing the idiot-elf that the forest being conscious was only a practical joke. That sounded like a bloody good sort of revenge. He had wasted enough time here. Time to finish off his drink and turn in for the night.

"ZI. GO. TO. BED."
"One second, Yuna. I just gotta kiss the tree good night!"